This year, I've been inspired by writer Ann Voskamp to embark on something more significant - a fast of ingratitude.
Ingratitude, you ask? Yes, it is as crazy as it sounds, and no, I don't expect I'll be able to keep it, curmudgeon that I am.
Ingratitude is one of those things that constantly lives in my heart. I always want more and what I have is never enough. Falling into it is as instinctive as breathing. So, am I setting myself up for failure? This isn't about being "good enough" or "doing it right." I'm committing to a posture of thanks, exercising it daily by listing what I am thankful for and giving God thanks for it.
Ann Voskamp did this, writing down one thousand things she loves. Yes - one THOUSAND. She considers it a spiritual discipline, a way of being fully aware of the gifts God has given her by naming them. Doing so more intimately connects us with the heart of God and his very deep love for us. In her words,
This act of naming grace moments, this list of God's gifts, moves beyond the shopping list variety of prayer and into the other side. The other side of prayer . . . the inner walls of His powerful, love-beating heart. The list is God's list, the pulse of His love - the love that thrums on the other side of our prayers. And I see it now for what this really is, this dare to write down one thousand things I love. It really is a dare to name all the ways that God loves me. (Voskamp, One Thousand Gifts)
It's a simple exercise, but one I know I'll have trouble keeping. But I have no alternative. Keep ingratitude alive, or true, God-filled joy will die.
I want to live - and live fully.
So here it is. My first of a thousand (or hopefully more) gifts:
1. Husband's sweater I am wearing, steeped in his scent.
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